


What makes us human

by fullmetalbi



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Found Family, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:28:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23078611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fullmetalbi/pseuds/fullmetalbi
Summary: Edelgard had been dead for too long. She had locked herself away from the world, only allowing people like her in it. Scared people and wounded people. She wouldn't let anybody hurt them any more.However, things start to change when humans start to come to the castle. And it all started when Lindhart brought his human.
Relationships: Caspar von Bergliez/Linhardt von Hevring, Dorothea Arnault/Petra Macneary, Edelgard von Hresvelg & Lysithea von Ordelia, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Bernadetta von Varley, Ferdinand von Aegir/Hubert von Vestra
Comments: 11
Kudos: 93





	1. New blood

It all started when Lindhart brought his human.

His name was Caspar and he was somehow a little ball of energy. At the beginning, Edelgard thought he could be a hunter, so she acted really guarded around him. She made Hubert track all his movements and asked him to research about his past too. He didn’t found much, but a friendly father figure and a good-for-nothing older brother who would inherit all his family titches.

However, the human wanted no pity. He trained and sparred with anything he could find suitable as a partner, be it Edelgard or a mattress pushed against a wall; he ate everything he could and he kissed Lindhart as often he could. He didn’t want rich clothes or great luxuries, in fact, not even a proper room for him was needed: Dorothea prepared one for him, but after a particularly stormy night, he decided to settle on Lindhart’s own room, from where the whole valley could be seen and whose green duvet bed was big enough to host a five member family easily.

He told them later how, for the longest time, he had been afraid of thunders, so when the rain started and he found himself alone in an unknown place, he decided to go with someone he knew better and felt safer with (ya’know, since he had saved me before). After that, he just decided to stay there, for Lindhart’s delight. Dorothea still laughed at the face he had made when Caspar had defended his change of rooms with his arm around the oblivious vampire’s waist.

But even when he loudly complained about it, Edelgard couldn’t bring herself to reprimand Dorothea about it. After all, it was still funny how Lindhart, who had been a vampire for his good two hundred years and had only used them to nap and to explore the ancient library of the Castle of Hresvelg, was now losing sleep and going outside just because this little hot-headed human. Suddenly, he would tell Dorothea about a beautiful place she could go to sing and declaim poetry, or explain Bernadetta how he intended to bring her new plants the next time he would go out, since in his last trip with Caspar he had found some strange flowers he had never seen before in the castle’s greenhouse, nor on the books of the library.

However, the effects of that new inhabitant of the castle were not only felt on Lindhart. After he found how much the outer world fascinated Bernadetta, he made his goal to show her all the beautiful surroundings of the castle. He didn’t always succeed in his mission of making her go out, but maybe a couple times a month the little girl would be completely fascinated by the time they joined all together to eat some dinner (although, since vampires didn’t need to eat, it was more as if they looked Caspar eat dinner and just spoke about how they had spent their day).

The first days she seemed a little bit spooked about what could happen to her out of the castle’s walls, but after seeing Caspar not only sparring with Edelgard, but even bringing her down just by the strength of his fists, she relaxed a bit more. After noticing that, Edelgard made a point to fake being defeated a couple of times more, in order to raise Bernadetta’s confidence in him and make her confident enough to enjoy also the outdoors as much as she used to.

However, Caspar wasn’t as delighted as her when he found out how Edelgard would just throw herself on the floor or not defend herself at some critical moments in order to be defeated. Even more when he was told by Lindhart how Edelgard was strong enough to bring down an entire army and she wasn’t even using a fraction of his power against him.

So he just decided to train harder.

Suddenly, Edelgard was being challenged at each time of the day and almost the night. Dorothea needed to buy new axes, since the older ones became blunt from the use, and, for the first time in nearly five hundred years, Edelgard found herself in trouble to flawlessly win a fight.

Caspar was resilient and would jump on his feet without minding how covered in blood his face was. No matter how many times Edelgard brought him down. It made her scared sometimes that he could turn against them and use that boldness to kill them all. Because he was bold and able to keep up with her pace, so that it was only a matter of time that he surprised her with a new and bolder attack each time.

Of course, she could just use her dark magic and sent him to the other side of the sparring room without as much of lifting a finger or, had she used Aymir, it was difficult to believe that he could have survived. But she didn’t want to kill him and she was sure that the feeling was reciprocated.

After all, Caspar could stab her with a wooden pike or just bathe in holy water before fighting, but he didn’t. Maybe because he fancied Lindhart, who was very much a vampire too. But, in any case, there was no strong motive to believe he would do that. So, if she intended to continue winning against the little human, she would have to fight again empty handed, just like she had when she escaped from the somber dungeon in which she was created: just with her fists and some old ax.

However, Caspar was a funny human. Each time she thought she had definitely left him behind, he surprised with a new punch or a new hook. So she needed to train a little bit more. And a bit more. And suddenly, Dorothea had brought not only a new set of axes to the castles, but also an attractive woman with pink hair and silent gaze.

The first time Edelgard saw her, she was so spooked that couldn’t help to hide behind the same door she just had crossed. She was just laughing with Dorothea, who was struggling to braid her long hair, although as soon as Edelgard entered the room, she stopped her giggles and her eyes changed from the eyes of a regular human to the eyes of a hunter. Edelgard’s heart almost stopped when that happened.

She… could recognize those eyes. That’s why she froze. Those eyes could kill her. That woman could kill her.

However, Dorothea soon explained to her how Petra was hunter from Brigid and, yes, she could be able to kill them all, but also was really in love with her, and Dorothea reciprocated those feelings too. So they should not worry about a single thing of all that.

Edelgard would have objected about it, but Petra soon became a part of their little vampire family. Caspar loved sparring with her and, although Bernadetta did ran from her a couple of times because of the simplest misunderstandings, she did warm up to her too. And she was able of the most heroic feat, make Lindhart actually move and help them with their chores. She managed to make him pick wood and cut it so that they could light fires in the castle (luckily, the last humans inhabitants of it left the chimneys quite clean and, once the fire was light there, there was no way it could escape).

Caspar and Petra… they weren’t the kind of humans Edelgard would have adopted, much less turned. But she could understand what Lindhart and Dorothea sew in them in order to fall in love.

She could understand when he saw Lindhart leaning against Caspar, or when she saw his face of faked angriness while he healed his arm. How he would just snuggle against him when they were in bed together. Or how, even if his eyes didn’t light up, like Dorothea did when she talked of Petra, his voice did felt sweeter than usual. Even if he tried to sound as bothered as possible, there was a certain sweetness about Caspar’s name on his mouth.

Dorothea, on the other hand, was beaming.

Edelgard knew better than anyone how hard her live had been and admired how, even when she was feeling down, tried her hardest to make life prettier to those around her. She remembered Huberts face after being called Hubbie for the first time (and when Dorothea said that sounded way too good, so Hubert should marry as soon as possible to become a real hubbie to someone). She remembered how Dorothea sang to her and told her how she actually was a good person and had a kind heart. And they all remembered her songs and her jokes. It wasn’t easy to forget them if they were due to happen each day.

But, with Petra, it was as if the bushes that were full of flowers showed themselves completely covered in berries. Almost defying all laws of reality, Dorothea was kinder, nicer and funnier. She laughed more and when she looked at Petra, it was as if she was staring at the most beautiful thing in life, as if she was seeing the Goddess herself. She even blushed, which was something she almost never did before.

It was as if she was alive again.

Definitely, humans seemed to have something around them that was turning the castle into something more livelier and welcoming that it had been for years. Edelgard talked about it with Hubert a couple of times. Not because she was bothered, but because she was surprised. One could say she never expected that old place of being able to be pleasant. Not livable, but pleasant. Maybe humans weren’t so much of a bother after all.


	2. Bright like the sun

However, when the next human came by, she was not ready for it.

Probably because nobody brought that human into the castle. He just invited himself in.

And did so loudly. Very loudly. Unpleasantly loudly.

And while telling everybody how that land was rightfully his, that they were living on his family castle. Annoying them by explaining the deeds of his ancestors when nobody had bothered to ask. Insultingly shining with his bright orange hair through the corridors, as if he was the sun itself, bothering to visit them little mortals and their miserable lives.

Edelgard soon hated him. And she refused to feel like a monster for doing so.

After all, Edelgard had met Bernadetta when she found her hiding of thieves in the old barns. And Lindhart had been literally a human she found asleep in the library one given day. So, it wasn’t because she was too uptight and unready for the unexpected. It was just that that concrete human was… overbearing.

His name was Ferdinand von Aegir. And after the third day, they were all able to remember it perfectly, even against their will. Firstly, because he introduced himself to all inhabitants of the castle, no matter if they ran away from him (Bernadetta) or threatened to kill him (Dorothea). And, secondly, because every time he could have a chance to announce his name, he would do, and in a rather grandiloquent way.

Even if they all desired to remain ignorant about it, they learned about the castle’s history. How it had been built many centuries ago by a powerful and brave man, who decided to settle down there in order to protect commoners of the dangerous pirates of the sea. How that man was so beloved by its servants that a golden monument was made to his memory and the coins were engraved with his effigy. How his enormous piety had made him build the biggest of all churches in the land. How he remained humble even after all this and welcomed his death by recognizing that “he, like all humans was just dust.”

Edelgard could have corrected him. She could have told him how his ancestor was no noble man, how he had been the pirate who attacked those lands until the people who inhabited them were all dead or hidden in caves. How he inspired fear, not love. How that monument was not to his memory, but to his pride. How he robbed people of their riches in order to cover it in the precious metal.

And how he had not been god-fearing in any way. How he had aspired to divinity. How he had lowered himself to the cruelest and most inhumane experiments in order to achieve it. And how he had filled his land with crosses and churches to try to protect himself from the creature he himself had created.

And, of course, how he had begged like a bitch when he died.

But she didn’t. Maybe because that was the only thing he seemed to have. His name. Showing it to him, covered it in dirt and blood, would be like stripping him of the only thing he had.

And he was a kind man underneath all that talk about his ancestors. Although he descended from that man, he did care about the inhabitants of that castle, vampires or not, and Edelgard could see it.

He was gentle with Bernadetta and tried his best to bring her out her bedroom. When Caspar put himself in danger, he rushed to rescue him and then scolded him with his voice trembling because of what could have happenned. He tried to make Lindhart do something productive with his life and knowledge and had long talks with Petra, to whom he asked many questions about her home country. He even tried to do amends with Dorothea, despite her openly hating his guts.

However, all that sweet talk disappeared as soon as he found Edelgard. In front of her, he did show how he was still the child of his ancestors.

To him, it was simple. He wanted that castle. He deserved to have that castle. It was his, after all. And he didn’t mind that the vampires were living on it. They were “neat” and well behaved. It wasn’t as if they went on murderous rampages each week, after all. So, they could stay.

Plus, he said, it was better that he, and not Edelgard, was in charge, since he could do anything she did, but better. So, if she wanted to settle it down with a duel, he would be delighted.

After all, he was sure he would win it. It was his right. The gods wouldn’t turn his face on him, or so he thought.

But Edelgard, even though he was annoying to the extreme, didn’t want to actually shatter all his hopes of being the honorable son of and honorable noble who had been loved by many.

She just had better things to do than killing that little man. She didn’t understand exactly why, but despised the idea of just making him and his endless vanity disappear. Maybe because she wanted the rest of them to feel safe with her. Maybe because she knew that he was not a bad man. Maybe because she knew his death would bring an end to that light and happiness that the castle had acquired after many centuries of silence.

Maybe because she didn’t want to remember.

So, each time he challenged her, he was met with the coldest show of indifference. She did that hoping he would get tired and stop doing it. Just acting as if he wasn’t there.

But, no.

The man was sure stubborn. After noticing how she wouldn’t accept dueling with him, he seemed to decide to turn everything Edelgard did in a sort of competition of who was better. When she talked with Bernadetta to make her feel better during a storm, he would appear too and start telling her ridiculous stories to make her laugh. When she was sparring with Caspar and asked him to stop because she was tired, he turned up in the training rooms to fight him twice the time Edelgard had been able to endure.

He would grow bigger flowers, cook tastier sweets, leave cleaner rooms, know twice the stories of the portraits in the castle. And it just came a point in which Edelgard couldn’t find a single place to rest and just keep on with her life without that being used to showcase her inferiority to the damned Ferdinand von Aegir.

And it was just too much.

So she agreed.

And she won.

And the human just consumed himself as if he was a candle.

And Edelgard couldn’t stand that.

“I just can’t look at him and see how he’s still wallowing on his misery.”

“Yes, lady Edelgard.”

Edelgard just huffed and sunk her face into one of her teddy bears. Hubert was for sure her most loyal friend and probably the only person she could trust that would go down with her had the situation required that. However, he was no better equipped than her to deal with more subtle and emotional matters. Not that she minded much or resented him for that, but sometimes, when she needed counsel about that kind of things… she really needed another pair of ears to rant to.

“Now they are all gloomier, mainly because he’s miserable and they have all too much kind of a heart to ignore him.”

“You are not ignoring him either”, noted Hubert.

“Yeah. But I was not oozing happiness anyway. But… Bernie, she was opening up and just getting confidence in going outside and asking around to get someone to join her. And now, each time she sees him goes back to her room again. And the same with Thea, you can notice how she feels bad every time she sees him desolate. And she used to hate him! Hate him. Why all this?”

She covered her face with her hands. That wasn’t supposed to be that complicated. She didn’t even change into her Hegemon form, nor she tried to kill him. She had just aimed and, before he could react, disarm him. And she had achieved just that, she won that fight without making him a single wound.

However, after the quick spar, she had left him as brokenhearted as if she had explained to him the deeds and merits of his ancestors. As if she had dug in his chest and took his heart out, had dried it and returned it inside. As if the sun had been covered by clouds, but clouds that stayed for whole weeks and months.

“What should I do, Hubert?”, she whispered. “I just want his old annoying self back. I don’t mind anymore if he keeps trying to tell me his whole family tree. Or if he tries to show me how his pudding is better than mine. I don’t even like cooking! He can beat me at it. But I can’t continue seeing this whole castle darkening again.”

“Well, it’s not so dark as it has…”

“Yeah, yeah, it is not as dark as it was before. But before I was alone. Now… ”

With a jump, Edelgard stood up and pulled the curtain in order to show her friend the yard where Caspar and Petra were sparring under the sleepy eyes of Lindhart, the cheers of Dorothea, and the nervous cries of Bernadetta. Just by looking at them she felt her chest hurt.

“I am a creature of the dark and I will live in darkness as long as I live. But they are not. They are not like me. And I want to keep them that way.”

Hubert nodded.

“And that requires to cheer up our noble newcomer.”

“Exactly.”

“What should I do then?”

Edelgard paused for a second. What could make that man feel better? She couldn’t get exactly why he was so depressed after being excelled in just one little thing of his whole crusade against her, but she understood that, maybe, she ought to just show him that he was valuable anyway. To explain to him that he was still welcomed in the castle. Yes, something like that would do.

“He seems weak-willed, but proud”, noted Hubert when she voiced her thoughts. “Won’t this wound him more in his ego? You are openly pitying him, that may worsen the whole thing.”

Edelgard sighed. That was true. Nobles are usually a whole ball of masculinity ready to be hurt by the smallest things.

“Then I may need to just show him”, she said. “Hubert?”

Hubert nodded, ready to obey her at command.

“You will inform him that he can stay in the castle as long as he wills. he’s doing that, but I want him to have the confirmation that we are overjoyed to have him. Tell him too we will provide him with money if he needs to buy anything at the market. You will explain what are everybody’s duties around here, that he can suggest meals to Bernadetta, help Petra with the hunting and everything, so that he knows how we work and can join us. Also…”

She stopped while her brain was running around thinking about things that could be make him feel better. He seemed rather distinguished and uptight, appreciating luxury in all its forms…

“You will also give him the best blankets and sheets of the castle, if I recall well, they are on one of the cabinets of the master bedroom. I’ll help you select them. If we could find fine clothes from his dead ancestors it could also help. Even if they are out of fashion, I’m sure Bernadetta will be able to make something wereable out of them. And…”

Hubert seemed a little bit intimidated, but she continued nevertheless.

“You will explain him this whole thing along with a cup of tea. I think there is some expensive tea somewhere in the kitchens, Lindhart will know where. And coffee for you, of course”, she added after watching her friend’s face.

“As you wish”, he said, bowing to her and leaving before she could try to ask him if it was okay for him to do all that.

That afternoon, Edelgard spied both of them from a window as they sipped their respective drinks. Next to Hubert, a beautiful chest waited closed. He had done the selection of linens by himself. The noble seemed calm and collected, even moved by the present.

That night, he approached her and thanked her for them.

“It was an inconsequential thing”, she told him. “There are way too many beautiful materials in this castle to leave them to rot. Have you spoken with Bernadetta about the clothes?”

“Have I spoken with whom?”

“Bernadetta. I told Hubert you could ask her about using old clothing to get…”

“Ah, yes, the clothes. Hubert had already spoken with her and, after our tea, he accompanied me to her sewing room so that she could show me the projects she thought about making and they were all wonderful. They look as good as my great-great grandfather’s brother on the…”

Edelgard sighed relieved and didn’t even register what he was saying about his family. She should have suspected that Hubert would follow her orders and even her thoughts. Despite his looks, he was truly a caring person. Probably the most caring person of the whole castle. She was lucky to have him.

Or not to have him.

“What? Are you going to meet him for tea today too?”

Hubert looked at her surprised.

“If Lady Edelgard wishes me to do something else…”

“No, no, no”, she assured him quickly. “Go and enjoy that cup of coffee, you sure deserve it.”

“If my lady needs me…”

Edelgard sighed while thinking the fastest way to make him comprehend how she wasn’t angry or bothered that he went to have tea with Ferdinand, that she was just surprised because it was the seventh day in a row and maybe she wanted to just roam around the library in silence with him at her side, that she was really happy to see him interact with more people, although she wasn’t sure in the beginning if they truly got along because they seemed to be always in a never ending argument, but if they felt comfortable around each other, who she was to talk, but she missed him…

And all those were way too much things, so she just tried to keep it simple and short.

“Your lady commands you to go with Ferdinand and have fun with him. You shall drink coffee and eat some cookies and talk about anything in your mind as you will. After that little date, I shall have you smiling and beaming as if you were too in love with Ferdinand like Dorothea and Petra, Caspar and Lindhart and the rest are. Now go.”

As if you were too in love.

Later, she thought about it, while waiting for sleep to come for her. She hadn’t thought about that before, but it truly made sense if they were. Hubert was usually a really closed up person, not even she, who had lived with him for centuries could know his deepest thoughts, but, after the tea dates with Ferdinand had begun, he relinquished in talking to the noble and sharing his ideas with him. It was a strange, yet refreshing change.

Soon she found that she couldn’t help but smile when she saw them interact.

Hubert would be just minding his business when Ferdinand would appear and tell him how he had found about another way they could preserve their food for winter, or this artisan who sells beautiful yarn we could buy for Bernadetta, or a beautiful spot they should go all together for a daytrip… and Hubert’s face would just relax and listen him as if it there was no better thing he could do in the world. Or it could happen the opposite, Ferdinand could be in the library or training and, as soon as Hubert stepped into the room, his face would light up and his lips formed a huge and genuine smile.

They were complete opposites in both character and appearance, but they seemed to fit seamlessly together. It only took a little bit of coffee and tea to set them on the right path. They would fight, argue, dissent about literally anything (one day they spent the evening discussing whether it would be better to hang the golden curtains or to keep the dark ones, and the next they had that exact discussion, but about the silverware), and yet end up their cups thanking each other for that delightful time they had had together.

It was beautiful. Even if it was love or just friendship. She wouldn’t change a thing, no matter how jealous it made her feel, as long as Hubert could looked that happy around Ferdinand. No matter how alone she felt.

However, the day she heard Ferdinand calling Hubert causally “beloved” and seeing her friend reddening to the roots of his hair was the final straw and her heart sank in her chest. It wasn’t an extraordinary revelation for her, after all, she had been suspecting that for months, but at the same time, to see the explicit confirmation of it… It couldn’t be.

Hubert leaning towards Ferdinand subtly during the meals… both of them quickly kissing in empty corridors before reuniting with the rest… Hubert nightly walks that didn’t respond to any order she had given him and the love bites he would try to hide under his shirt the next day… It was obvious.

He had ended up with the love disease too. She could see him under a tree in the garden in a little picnic that Ferdinand had improvised, protecting himself of the sun that filtered through the leaves; walking to town with Dorothea to buy him a special present, or just casually passing by the garden when he returned mounted on his horse.

He had joined the people who lived in the light, loving and being loved under the sun.

And she felt truly happy for him. She did.

If only darkness didn’t feel so heavy upon her shoulders, if only the silence of her room didn’t feel so lonely after knowing that nobody else in the castle was sleeping alone at night. Maybe if that wasn’t the case, she wouldn’t feel so bad in that same bed, darkness and silence she had been for centuries.

But that was nonsense.

She was a creature of darkness and silence. She would endure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, two little things:  
> 1) Thank all of you so fkn much for all the kudos. Like, I literally posted the first part because that had been on my desktop for weeks and I had absolutely zero expectations to get any kudos or hits. Like, I've never had more than nine kudos on a fic, and this wasn't a really thought-out work, it was just an idea I thought it was cool and with which I played for a bit... and them bam, this. Yeah, I know that there are people with over a hundred kudos, but for me this is huge and I cannot express my gratitude enough for that. Thank you so much.  
> 2) Related to that, I wanted to apologize because I took ages to sit down and write this chapter. I literally posted it the same day I started to work on a longer work of my own, since I didn't thought anybody would mind if I ever left it uncomplete, so I could take my sweet time. I worked on it until the writer block hit me and then I just tried to finish this, but I couldn't find the link between Ferdie's and Eddie's B support and Ferdinand's and Hubert's A suport, so it ended up being like it has ended up being and I hope it's not too bad.


	3. Piercing my heart open

Edelgard looked at the raven haired swordsman who Bernadetta had brought to the castle for the hundredth time. Next to her, Ferdinand and Hubert did the same, but with matching teacups in their hands and identical frown. He was… strange.

“Foreigner”, he had confirmed himself. “From Faerghus.”

He was tall, pale and rude. Obscenely direct. And perhaps too harsh. But he made a little exception with the little vampire, indulging in the little gifts she made to him. He didn’t change his general demure, he just seemed softer. As if he was a stray cat she had adopted. Edelgard wouldn’t say it out loud, but she could swear she had seen him literally purr while Bernadetta massaged his shoulders after a training. Except the stray cat was way taller than her and had an obsession with sword training.

“What’s the problem with him? Now that I find at last someone to train with”, complained Caspar.

Edelgard just held her head between her hands. How difficult could that possibly be? Obviously, Caspar could be just joking. Even him knew how exaggerated his training habits were. However, Dorothea…

“We can’t make this to her. This is something huge for her.”

They had all reunited during a brief walk through the castle Bernadetta would give to Felix, under the supervision of Petra to check that nothing went out of hand. Although probably not all had really an opinion about the newcomer, Edelgard had summoned them all.

Bernadetta was the most fragile of them. She had always been and helping her or making feel safe was a basic chore they all did sooner or later. The stranger seemed to make her happy, of course, but what if… ?

“He’s rude, of course. And harsh. I won’t deny that. But he is honest and, god, it was Bernie the one who brought him here.”

“To show him the cats”, said Lindhart.

“And what about it? Bernie said clearly that it was an excuse and, if she was willing to use an excuse as weak as that to bring that man around it means that she wants him around! It’s Bernie, after all.”

“Yeah, we know it’s her”, said Ferdinand, nodding lighly.

“Dorothea”, said Hubert. “The problem is not that Bernie brought him or not. The problem is whether he’s trustworthy or not. And, if he does any kind of harm to her…”

He left that last part open for interpretation, but his grim face admitted absolutely no doubts about the nature of the consequences of that. However, Dorothea did not flinch.

“If he does anything against Bernie, relax Hubie, that you won’t be the only one making him wish he was never born at all. I won’t hesitate.”

“Yeah, if he ends up being bad, we can still kick his ass. He has no chance.”

Dorothea gave Caspar the side-eye before leaning over the table to look at Hubert in the eye.

“But what if he is what Bernie needs? What if we undo all the progress she was making? What if he ends up being good?”

Hubert didn’t even blink.

“Will be worst to have Bernie be scared again rather than dead? Are you really equating those two?”

Dorothea sighed.

“Are we truly going there?”

“What do you think the risks are? He’s a stranger, we don’t know nothing about him. He could be a hunter…”

“So was Petra! And she has harmed me in no way, rather the opposite. So what are you going to do if that is the case? If you decide to kill a person who made Bernie happy just because you trusted nobody?”

“You are not Bernie”, said Hubert, glaring dangerously at her.

“Even if I was, I would like to have the freedom of choosing my own companions through life.”

“And she has! She has us.”

“So now she can’t decide anymore? Goddammit, Hubert, I thought after meeting Ferdinand you would understand, but you don’t. Love requires risks. El could have killed us all when she found us. But she didn’t do that. And we could have killed her. And we didn’t did that. But we all took a risk, didn’t we? And she has us. If that man tries to do anything with her, we will all be near to help her and prevent that anything bad happens.”

“Lady Edelgard had me.”

“Lady Edelgard had me”, repeated Dorothea in a high pitched fake voice. “Hubert!”

“I kept an eye on Petra for the first days she was here. And so did Edelgard. And Petra is a sweet person who wanted nothing but to be with you. This… man just wants to spar, and train, and sleep. Just that. Forgive me for being more suspicious of this man of the fucking land where they would hunt us to pass the fucking time and become _heroes_.”

Hubert looked absolutely murderous and Dorothea, for the first time, looked unsettled, while Lindhart was looking every piece of decoration available in the room. Only Caspar seemed untouched by his words.

But only because he didn’t _knew_.

Hubert never swore. Not if he wasn’t absolutely pissed off and about do some not pretty stuff. Like when those humans tried to kidnap Dorothea or almost burned down the castle.

“We can still do this to him. Notice how we are all reunited here, and yet she stills has Petra to help her if she’s in trouble. We are more than enough to make turns around her and make sure she’s never truly alone with him for a while. And, just because he’s brazen and harsh doesn’t mean he doesn’t love her. Like… look at yourself. You aren’t what could be described as a loving person.”

Ferdinand arched his brows, but kept his gaze low and stayed out of the conversation.

“And I would advice you to be careful around me, if you had just met me.”

“Like you were around Petra?”

“I repeat. Just because you warmed up quickly to her, doesn’t mean we all did.”

“But what is different now? He’s a hunter, just like Petra and… ”

“He’s a warrior. Obsessed with his training and becoming deadlier. Petra hunts animals. This man will hunt us. And, I repeat: you are not Bernadetta. She’s fragile, both to swords and to words. I won’t stand by as she breaks. Feel free to do the opposite though.”

“We can also take care of her! We can help her without deciding for her!”

“But what if we are not on time? What if he stabs her before you can arrive? What if he tells her how she should be dead, that we don’t love her and wish to kill her? What if he actually does something, like you are deluding yourself of thinking?”

Dorothea lost her patience.

“What if a balcony falls and kills her, Hubert? What if the castle catches fire? What if an actual hunter comes and truly kills us? What if someone hides silver in the weapons we buy in the town? What if there is an earthquake and we end up buried in the ruins of the castle forever? What if, Hubert? What if?”

She shouted her last words with tears on her eyes, although Hubert didn’t even blink at her.

Shaking, she sat down next to Caspar and Lindhart and Ferdinand hanged her his hankerchief to dry her eyes. Hubert looked at her without moving a single muscle. He gave her time to calm down before, sternly saying:

“Anyway, I’m not the lord of this castle, nor do I intend to be. Edelgard, what are your thoughts?”

Suddenly, Edelgard saw herself thrown into the attention of all her friends. She saw Dorothea’s teary eyes, but also Caspar’s puppy gaze and Ferdinand’s concerned face. Hubert expression was unreadable, but he had made his feelings more than crystal clear.

She stared at her hands. Hubert was right, had they done this meeting when Petra arrived, she wouldn’t have allowed her to stay. Neither with Ferdinand. Or Caspar, if they had to guide themselves by the criteria Hubert had said.

But, in the end, they had turned to be indispensable parts of their little family. She couldn’t imagine now mornings without Ferdinand’s talks about how a wonderful day it was and how they could do this instead of that since it could be so much better. Or the halls without Petra silent climbing higher and higher every tower and every tree. Or the castle in general in silence, without Caspar loud shouts about literally everything.

However, that was different.

It was Bernadetta. She had been the first human she found. The scared, trembling and sweet Bernadetta. The others could manage. They all had been harmed in the past, yes, but not as much as her and not in a so damaging way as her. Bernadetta… her father had not been the first human Edelgard had killed. But it had been the death that had brought more peace to her heart. She had not felt such peace with her hands soaked in blood before. Not even when she killed the people who experimented on her, or the person who moved the strings to make it happen.

She loved Bernadetta. She liked how, even though she suffered of panic attacks and had extreme social phobia, she still tried to make friends and made efforts to develop actual relationships with people. Like the time when she embroidered twin flowers in Hubert’s clothes and hers, to signal he was his friend. Or when, after much time living in the castle, they started watering the flowers together.

On the back of her mind, she thought about how she had forgotten her. Forgotten that she had her. Bernie had always been somehow the collective little sister of them all. But she had thought herself to be alone, since, it seemed having a romantic partner was the only love that mattered. But she had been mistaken, and Bernie had found herself someone to love too…

For a moment, Edelgard pondered if she could correct what she had done. Kick that swordsman out of the castle. Be more time with Bernadetta. Be the partner she could have wanted. Take care of her.

For a second, she thought about it. She could make it pass as concern. Hubert would surely agree with her, and so would Ferdinand. Lindhart probably would get behind her too, and, even though Dorothea was clearly against it, if she said it was better for Bernadetta’s security, she wouldn’t complain. Same with Caspar.

She could see how they looked up at her. How they trusted her.

And that meant she couldn’t do that.

She could not deny Bernadetta an opportunity at happiness just because she was scared and felt lonely. She could not retaliate against a person for loving Bernadetta as they all did. Because she knew and she knew all of them knew. The swordsman loved Bernadetta, took care of her and made her happy.

Who was she to deny Bernadetta of a new companion? It wasn’t as if she would abandon them.

“I think Dorothea is right”, she said at last. “We were right to be careful for the first days, and we should still be careful. But this man has been more than a week here and has done no harm. He eats, he trains, and he makes Bernie happy. I don’t have any complain about him.”

Hubert’s face didn’t change, but she knew he wouldn’t talk back at her. Ferdinand looked also concerned, his whole face shouted “can we talk later”. But Caspar seemed happy and Dorothea looked absolutely relieved.

And she felt at peace with that choice.

That night, she observed the man, still with the flowers Bernadetta had braided in his hair, talking quietly with Petra. They were very alike. Scary, powerful… alike. And not only between each other, but also to her. And to Hubert.

She had also been scared of Petra when she arrived. She used to literally freeze. Because she was strong and her people’s had suffered much because of nobles in that land. Nobles like, arguably, Edelgard. But she had ended loving Dorothea more than any of them. Making her bloom in the most spectacular roses humanity could have ever dreamed of.

Wouldn’t that man mean the same for Bernadetta?

No danger would come from him. _Not more than of any of them_.

Their family was growing, and if Bernadetta wanted to bring in a silent moody swordsman for Faerghus, be it. Being a family also meant trusting each others. And letting each others grow. Like the flowers she tended with Bernadetta, sometimes people bloom in strange ways after finding love.

How would bloom Bernadetta?

And her?

Would she ever bloom?


	4. And you call this love?

Edelgard had always thought she was alone. Not only in the emotional sense of the word, but also on the sense of “nobody who has had my same experiences is still alive”. Call it being old. Call it having been experimented for years along a big group of people and being the only person who didn’t die.

Of course, that didn’t mean that she didn’t appreciate those who are near her. Petra, Bernadetta, Dorothea, Caspar, Lindhart, Ferdinand… even that swordsman from Faerghus. And, of course, that didn’t mean she didn’t appreciate Hubert. Silent grim Hubert who had been by her side since they met. Silent grim Hubert who didn’t mind renouncing death and his place alongside living beings to be with her.

No, no. She would be forever grateful for them all. And she would be forever grateful and indebted to Hubert. They were what she valued the most.

But she knew they weren’t the only people that she had valued the most.

She had been once a kid. A kid with many siblings and many cousins. A kid who played with other kids and feared not a thing in the world, because grown-ups would always take care of her. A kid with a family which was both blood-related and love-related. A normal kid, she has to remind herself.

But that was before that noble came.

He wanted immortality. He wanted a heart that did not age and blood that did not rot. His advisors told him it could be done by taking old blood and putting it on new veins. A heart strong enough to re-invigorate old blood was what he needed. The experiments wouldn’t be nice, but they were sure that the goal was within their reach.

Edelgard never thought their little village was just one of many. She never knew even why were they chosen. She just remembered the dungeons and the blood and the screams.

When she was there, her previous existence of sun, love and security became somewhat a forgotten dream. It was painful to remember another world was possible. Even looking at faces who she had seen there was. Nobody could take care of her. She couldn’t trust them.

However, they did. And she didn’t realize that until she was all alone and they had all died. She hated herself during lifetimes for that and, even though it somewhat healed, it left a scar which would torment her during cold days in winter and hot days in summer.

It was then when she summoned enough courage to go down to the dungeons again to meet them again and see if she could help. That pained her too. She escaped and was able to kill that noble before he ate her heart. But she didn’t return underground until hundreds of years had passed.

Part of her tried to comfort her. Didn’t the guards say that she was the last when they took her to the laboratory and chained her to the table?

But the other part of her, the most hurt, reminded her that she could still hear their cries ringing in her ears. They were alive and she abandoned her.

“But you still hear them now”, said the compassionate part of her. “Plus, what good is it that you continue torturing yourself. Didn’t they hurt you enough?”

That second part looked a lot like Dorothea. She never told her what actually happened, but the other woman somewhat knew that Edelgard has a dark past and made a point of telling her that it didn’t make her unlovable. She told her she didn’t have to atone for anything. She just had to love other people, as she did, but also love herself.

Edelgard didn’t believe her.

Love. As if it was that easy.

She deserved pain. And she wanted pain. Pain made her human.

She clung onto this though. She had clung to it for years, when she was bleeding, when she was freezing and when she felt immeasurably alone.

Maybe it was because it was the only memory she kept from her father. Given how both his face and voice had withered in her mind, she couldn’t afford to lose also his words.

_Pain makes us human._

She remembered it had been not so long before being captured. Her older brother had been howling because of the pain, holding with his hand his badly-bandaged arm and refusing any kind of physical contact, so her father tried to comfort him.

“There isn’t any problem with the pain”, she remembered him saying. “The pain means that you are alive. As long as you feel the pain, it means that you are still with us. It means that you are still a human.”

_You are still with us._

She took out their corpses from the dungeon and gave them a tomb in a nearby field. But when she did, most of them had already lost their flesh, eaten by rats or simply rotten away. They were just bones. She did it either way.

She remembers that it took almost a human lifetime to finish that. When she finished, she had wept on the side of that barren field, snowflakes falling on her clothes and on the dark earth were they would forever lie. Hubert had been with her that day and held her hand. She still remember the touch of his rough palm, usually covered by white gloves.

That had been the first time she actually let herself cry after becoming a vampire. She remembered trying to see herself on a mirror, as if, by the magic of letting tears fall down her face, the blood experiments had been reversed. They didn’t, of course. After that, she trashed all the mirrors, not caring how much more unlucky she could be. Misfortune

Many years later, Bernadetta helped her plant forgetmenots in that field. The little vampire made the suggestion without having any idea of all the little parts of Edelgard’s heart were buried there, but it was a good idea. Filled with blue flowers, the mass grave doesn’t look so terrible and was even a good spot to make picnics and relax with the rest.

Not that Edelgard could relax there, of course.

She sometimes thinks if her old people would be angry because she is alive and substituted them with other living beings. Other times, she thinks they would have liked her not being alone.

She dreamed of them many nights, but they never had faces in those dreams. She knew they had, because she did remember crying when she started forgetting. But she didn’t remember anymore.

Part of her wanted to give thanks for that because it made it a little less painful.

Part of her wanted to cry and despair because, some nights, their faces were of those who lived in the castle with her. Petra, Bernadetta, Dorothea, Caspar, Lindhart, Ferdinand… Hubert. She knew it was her head setting her up, but sometimes it was too easy to believe that her old friends were punishing her for forgetting. Sometimes it was too easy to believe that she should be dead too.

That’s why she almost broke down when she saw a little girl with purple eyes, white hair and quite a temper in the castle. She thought it was her past haunting her. Had she little sisters? Or little cousins? For a moment, she was frantically searching in her past for that face, but she couldn’t find anything. She forgot all. The guilt and the pain washed over her like a giant wave, leaving her incapable of moving.

Later, she remembered her hair used to be brown before the experiments. Just like her eyes weren’t purple. And then she learned that the girl was there, not because of her, but because of Lindhart. It turned out he had been writing letters to universities and other centers of knowledge to learn more about vampires.

For a moment, Edelgard was angry with him and nearly told him to leave the castle, but Hubert promptly explained her that he had been helping all the newcomers adapt into being a vampire by explaining the bodily and mental changes they would be experimenting. And that his research was him just trying to learn how his body worked. Plus, he took all the precautions so that the castle and the vampires are still unknown.

However, that new girl, Lysithea she said it was her name, was something new for him. Hubert told her he had actually invited her because she was an “odd” vampire: her teeth weren’t blunt enough to draw blood from other living beings and she had problems digesting it. They wrote each other letters back and forth for a while trying to discover the cause, but nothing seemed to make sense.

“She says that a single person didn’t turn her into a vampire, but multiple people”, explained Lindhart, after being questioned by Edelgard. “Plus, she has been a vampire for decades already, but she’s still in pain, as most of us have been for the first months of being turned. And, it seems like it isn’t the regular pain of organs readjusting or a little bit of tiredness. She said something like ‘having been dissected and pulled apart, but joined badly together’ of her turning, but that’s… impossible? Like, most vampires are created by biting and becoming part of a family, but she doesn’t report anything similar?”

“Wait, vampire families?”, asked Dorothea. “So there are more vampires who have done the same thing as us? That’s great! Could we meet them?”

“There have been more vampires in the past. Right now, alive, I just found Lysithea. And the rest of us, of course. But researching, I learned that most vampires were communal beings. Those myths of people being mysteriously turned can be true, but more often than not vampires turned only people who they wanted to keep with them. And biting had its own ceremony that symbolized the complete entrance of a stranger in the family, clan, community, whatever you want to call it.”

“You definitely learn something new each day”, mused Ferdinand. “I used to think that you all… I say, we just were weird. Almost all what I heard about vampires had always been of them being murderous evil monsters, not family-oriented creatures with proper weddings and all that.”

Lindhart gave him a little contemptuous look, but Edelgard was sure that most of it was due to the disrespect Ferdinand had shown, not to Lindhart, but to his beloved object of study. Had the other man said something like that of vines and their medicinal uses, he would have received the same treatment.

“Neither biting nor that specific ceremony are linked to marriage or coupling in any way”, he stated. “Or do you consider Hubert as married to Edelgard? Or Dorothea, or myself?”

“We go from Edelgard and her vampires to Edelgard and her harem”, joked Dorothea, taking pleasure in Ferdinand’s confusion by that last statement.

“Just because the last wave of newcomers in this particular community have been driven by romantic feelings doesn’t mean that is always like that”, added Lindhart. “In fact, if we had followed the ceremony, there would have been a part of you stripping in front of all of us, burning your clothes and crossing a pond or a body of water before being bit by the oldest vampire and head of the community. Not the lovey dovey stuff you were thinking about.”

“Well, but right now, we could definitely do that”, said Dorothea. “Plus, just because that was your case it doesn’t mean that none of the turnings Edelgard made were romantic”, and then she winked to Edelgard, who felt her face redden with embarrassment.

Suddenly, all the attention was shifted from Lindhart to Edelgard and Dorothea, with a mouth wide open in amazement in the worst cases and arched eyebrows questioning in the worst.

“What?”, asked Caspar in the end, verbalizing the common feeling nobody wanted to voice.

“You didn’t knew of our thing? And like, how I was turned and stuff?”

“I thought she had found you around the castle, like she did with most of us”, said Bernadetta with her little voice.

“But, wait”, Ferdinand was obviously very confused, “you are with Petra and with Edelgard at the same time? Like, does she know?”

“We didn’t work out”, said Edelgard quickly. “And our thing was barely weeks long. Dorothea and I didn’t hid anything from you because, by the time she came to the castle, we were just friends. So she hasn’t been cheating on Petra with me or anything similar.”

“Oh”, whispered amused Caspar.

“Anyway, returning to what we were talking about. Ferdinand”, said Lindhart, “vampires can be murderous and evil, and some of them are, but I wasn’t speaking of killing, but turning. Someone ought to be very stupid to make someone, with whom they don’t sympathize, immortal. The family structure is logic since it helps both the vampires who do the turning to gain protection and power in numbers, and the ones who are being turned to not be left alone dealing with the changes they experience.”

“Oh”, repeated Caspar.

“The thing is”, finished Lindhart, “Lysithea didn’t report experiencing that. She says she was alone and the people who turned her weren’t vampires.”

After listening those three last words, Edelgard’s blood seemed to stop in her veins. Lindhart voice echoed in her ears. _She was alone and the people who turned her weren’t vampires._ _A_ _single person didn’t turn her into a vampire, but multiple people._ _She said it was like_ _‘having been dissected and pulled apart, but joined badly together._

Suddenly, all pieces clicked in her mind. She was not alone. That noble had not been the only one. There were still more people like her because there had been more people like him. There were more people who had been tortured and turned into a vampire and there were more people willing to make others pay that price. That was why Lysithea shared her unnatural hair and eye color.

She had thought of herself as alone, as someone who had gone through more pain than the rest of humans had and ended up with extraordinary powers as a result. As someone far above the rest.

But Lysithea was far younger than her, but she had been through the same.

Those two thoughts drowned everything in her mind after that. She barely listened to the others talking and just locked herself in her room. Her heart, if it still lived in her chest, was beating too fast.

The idea of Lysithea being like her made her dizzy. She felt suddenly exposed, as if the other girl could tell the rest about her own past and about how Edelgard didn’t help her old friends and let them die. It didn’t matter that she was a scared girl with no power back then. She should have done something. Save them or something. It had been her fault. Why was she still alive after all?

Why was she alive if she had been unable to save other people like herself? Why had she been so self-centered not to think there had to be more selfish humans ready to bet it all on eternal life? Why didn’t she help other people like Lysithea? She had had a family, for sure. But they would be all dead, _and it would be Edelgard’s fault_. Why she thought herself to be so special?

Plus, the others, Dorothea, Lindhart, Petra, Caspar, Bernadetta… would hate her if they learned about the tortures. Or, at least, they would look her down. She wouldn’t be any longer the omnipotent being who graciously saved them but a little girl who had been traumatized and left alone for too much time. She was not a strong protector. She was a weak victim. _And nothing had changed._

That night, she had nightmares again.

And the next.

And the next.

And each time she closed her eyes, her mind showed even more terrifying images.

It was as if her past had come to hunt her down.

She tried to compensate that by spending less time alone, since it was when nobody was around that the visions reached their worst form. However, she didn’t feel either like talking to the others and just sharing what was happening, so she just tagged around them: cleaning the weapons while Caspar and Ferdinand sparred, dusting the shelves of the library and hearing Lindhart muttering, helping Petra and Bernadetta with the garden… as long as she didn’t have to open her mouth, everything would be alright.

Or so she thought.

The other white haired vampire may had been new to the castle, but she was perceptive and, unlike the rest of them, didn’t have any qualms in calling her out, since she didn’t think of her as the lady of the castle nor as someone she ought to respect.

“Edelgard”, called her one day when they were alone in the garden, “Are you truly such a terrible person or you just really like to look like one?”

“What?”, managed to ask Edelgard, hoping to have misheard it and that it had been just an hallucination.

But it wasn’t. And Lysithea didn’t even flinch when repeating her words. Luckily, they managed to wake up her pride a little bit, so that instead of tearing her completely apart, a coat of coldness and harshness spread throughout her whole body.

“You barely know me.”

“I don’t need to. It’s enough to look at how you treat your friends”.

“And how am I treating them?”

“You ignore them. You parade your misery in front of them, but refuse to accept their help. You see them trying to reach up to you, you see them worrying, and yet, you do nothing while still moping everywhere around.”

Edelgard tightened her lips.

“You barely know me”, she repeated. “And you have no idea of what I’ve been through. So don’t waste your breath preaching on me.”

“Again, I don’t need to. Even if you have had a difficult life? Do you really believe you are the only one who had it? And now that gives you permission to lock yourself up and lick your wounds, as if there is nothing you can do to put an end to it?”

That hurt.

“Maybe there is nothing I can do”, said Edelgard, hating how near her voice was to completely break down. She hated herself so much it was unbelievable.

But that didn’t seem to matter

“I don’t believe you. We all can do something with the time we have. Even if it’s just not being shitty to those around us.”

“Well, I try not to be. But sometimes it’s rather difficult.”

“It is rather difficult not to be an ass? Please.”

“Please what? You, of all people, should understand me. Or don’t you have nightmares too? Don’t you have days when even talking is painful and your memories want to kill you?”

Lysithea took a step back. Suddenly, she didn’t look so assured as before.

“What nightmares?”

“The nightmares of darkness and pain. The nightmares with your dead family.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Didn’t they experiment on you too? Cut your veins to put new blood on them? Didn’t that made you a vampire?”

The face of the other woman became even paler.

“How do you know that?”, she whispered.

“Your hair, it wasn’t always white, wasn’t it? And your eyes weren’t lilac neither.”

And her eyes widened with understanding.

“Wait, you…”

“Yes. I… I thought you knew.”

Lysithea shook her head.

“I had no idea.”

“Then, you will agree with me that it’s a bad idea to talk about other people’s problems as if they were your own. Have a good day.”

And with those words, Edelgard decided to end the conversation.

However, later that day, she decided to have tea with Dorothea and apologized to her for worrying her, which ended in the other vampire joking how she needed to find a partner to Edelgard so that she could be happy and in love like them, and telling her how she would be there for her always. Caspar shouted at her that, she should eat or rest, since “you can’t fight well when you’re sad or tired”, while Lindhart only said “and what?” when she apologized for her silence.

Bernadetta was also quite understanding, after all, it was hard for her to leave her room some days. Felix, like Caspar, didn’t almost bat an eye. “Silence is better than senseless talk. Do not apologize about it.”

That night, she slept a little better and, when she woke up a little bit before sunrise from a nightmare, instead of curling up on her own, she decided to go out and see if anybody was in the mood for chatting. She found Petra and Ferdinand, who were taking a walk. She joined them and heard them speak about the trees, the people in nearby villages and their distant families. While they did, she realized she had never actually spoke with them alone, not with Hubert, not with Dorothea, not with the rest, and, had she done that, the topic was always related to the other vampires and not their own lives.

She listened to them in silence. Petra talked about her family, who lived in a far away island she longed to visit with Petra, Bernadetta and the rest. Ferdinand talked about horses in his family house, about his old mother and about the plans he had for the future given his newfound immortality. He wanted to help the kids in nearby villages, to set up a school or something like that.

“Not that I have the best temperament to be a teacher, those are Dorothea, Lindhart and you”, he said to Petra. “But I think it could be a good use of my time. Plus, I could give back to them and compensate all the pain my family caused.”

Edelgard nodded absently while she heard him. Giving back, helping others. Those were good values to live by. She still though about it when she returned to her bed, wondering if she could build some place so that people wouldn’t be left in the cold of the winter that was approaching. And maybe demolish the whole castle. She had lived inside it for a long time, but also knew how her new family barely used most of the rooms. They could make a reform or something. Turn it into a little village with sturdy and warm houses where they, and more people could live. That could be an actual revenge on the memory of that noble. He was willing to kill hundreds to elude death. Tearing his castle apart to house those hundreds sounded like poetic justice.

She was almost asleep when she realized she had been referring to the rest of them as her new family. It was obviously due to Lindhart’s talk about vampires some days before, but it made her smile a little bit.

That night she had not any nightmares. And, in the morning, she woke up ready to develop her little project. However, when she was inspecting the castle, to see whether it was feasible or not, Lysithea surprised her with a piece of strawberry cake she had baked. They decided to go eat them in the garden.

“I usually eat sweets when I’m in pain”, explained the little vampire when they sat down at least. “The sugar helps me feel better.”

Edelgard nodded, a little bit confused, and took a little bite.

“Tastes good”, she said. “Thank you so much for baking it for me.”

“I’m glad. I didn’t know what to use, since I have no idea of your tastes, but Bernadetta told me she had picked strawberries from the garden, so I decided to use those. And well. I’m sorry for telling you that you were a horrible person. You were right to tell me to shut up.”

“No, you were right. I shouldn’t treat my friends like that and I deserved to be called out. Plus, when I told you you had no idea of what I’ve been through? That was dumb when I just told you I had been through the same things than you. So I’m sorry too.”

“I… Usually I am not so good with people around me too, so maybe I projected a little too much onto you. As you can see, I’m not the sweetest around here.”

“Neither am I. But maybe that’s why like eating sweets. We need to get that sugar from somewhere.”

The joke was awful, but Lysithea smiled timidly after hearing it and Edelgard’s heart felt lighter.

“I’ve never heard of a joke so bad from a person that isn’t my father.”

“Do you have a father?”, blurted Edelgard before realizing.

“Yes…?”

Lysithea looked at her so puzzled that Edelgard was prompted to explain herself:

“All my family died in the experiments they used to make me and I thought it was the same for you. But ignore me, I’m glad it isn’t the case. However, your parents must be very old right now.”

“A little bit. But they are still here and I feel happy for that.”

“I’m glad you have them”, smiled Edelgard.

“One last question”, she asked when they were about to part ways again. “Is Hubert also like us?”

“No. Why would you think that?”

“He always covers almost all his skin, just like you. I thought it could be to hide the scars.”

“Oh, no. Or not for that.”

“Not for that?”, asked Lysithea.

“Let’s just say his father was not a good man. And that not all scars come with immortality.”

Lysithea nodded and didn’t ask more questions, but, later, Edelgard saw her offering a piece of strawberry cake to her grim friend, who accepted a little bit confused. Something strange turned inside her as she saw that.

That, combined with Lindhart’s talk from some days before and the fact that Petra, Lysithea and Ferdinand already had relatives who were _alive_ started to stir up her mind that night. And after a quick calculation, she thought her little idea could be right. However, as she did with any important project, she decided to consult it with all of them.

Hubert told her it could be possible, although a little bit complicated and potentially dangerous. Dorothea was ecstatic and couldn’t wait to start with that project. Lindhart didn’t care, neither in a positive or negative way, but became a supporter after thinking about the perks of having potentially another researcher in the castle. Bernadetta, although startled by it, was also fine with it. “As long as I have my room to retreat and all of you, I guess I’ll be alright”, she said.

Caspar, just like his boyfriend did, was beaming just by thinking of new people to train with. And Felix, while not exactly eager to meet more persons, also liked that aspect. Petra, on her side, told her it was sweet and maybe she would bring her family, but probably just to visit. “The island is their home, so I don’t want them to abandon it forever. I would also like to go there with Dorothea. And maybe all of you can come. Even to live there, if you wanted to”, she said.

Only Lysithea was left, so, as casually as she could, she approached her while the other vampire was getting ready to bake some sweets for Felix, who she was trying to befriend one cake at a time.

“About your parents, did you think about turning them? So that they don’t die. It’s hard being immortal, but mainly because you are doomed to see other people die. However, you already are.”

She shook her head.

“I can’t. My fangs”, she said, opening her mouth to signal them, “aren’t blunt enough. But, yes, I wish I was able to do that. I never thought it was possible before, but I’ve been thinking about it.”

Just like she had expected. Now she just had to _tell_ her.

“I could do that. For you, I mean. Plus, I was thinking about turning this castle in a more welcoming place, so more people could live here. So you could bring your family here and –”

“That was why you were looking at all the stones with a serious face? I thought we would be under attack or something.”

“I…” Edelgard was completely taken by Lysithea’s suggestion. The factor about attacks was true. Maybe the whole idea was too innocent and futile to be worth pursuing. Of course, she had her Hegemon form, which could come in handy if anyone tried to harm them, but…

“You really thought you were being sneaky or something? You are the worst about keeping secrets. You’ve have had Ferdinand and Hubert worried the whole week. Not to talk about Felix and Caspar who were acting as if we were going to war in any moment.”

Edelgard was floored. That explained the look in their faces when she told them she had been thinking of reforming the castle so new people could come in. They had looked too surprised and she had been double thinking all that, but it turned to be a more simple thing. Although she couldn’t help but be bothered, since she thought of herself to a more discrete person. But Lysithea just laughed at her face.

“You are such a dummy. But, yes. I would love to bring my parents here. Plus, some friends I made before coming. Like, I thought I would return with them or something when Lindhart found out what was wrong with me, but…”

“But what?”

Lysithea looked at the sky absentmindedly.

“I don’t know. It feels good to be here with you. All of you. I don’t feel bad for being a vampire here. And lately I’ve been thinking about how Ferdinand reminds me so much about Lorenz or Caspar of Raphael. And how Dorothea and Hilda feel so alike when they try me to make me feel good. And how I would love to have them meet all of you. Plus I… I don’t want to see them die.”

Her voice sounded so tiny at the end of the sentence it made Edelgard’s heart sink.

“I understand.”

Both remained in silence for a while. The conversation had been left clearly unfinished, but if neither of them did something to keep it ongoing, soon they would be finding themselves looking for an excuse to leave the room.

In the end, Edelgard did.

“Lysithea, do you wish to remain a vampire? Or do you wanted to be human again?”

“I…”, she started, clearly conflicted.

“I don’t mind if you did. For a long time, I wished I was dead than like this. I sometimes wish I was dead, than like this. So I don’t blame you in any way if you wished to do so. It’s hard to see loved ones go.”

Lysithea nodded.

“Well, yes. I… this was more of a curse than a blessing. A lot more of a curse. And I blamed myself, my parents blamed themselves and everything was a mess. So, when I heard about a mysterious scholar who seemed to know more about vampires than any other person, I thought there could maybe be a chance…”

“I can understand. But now you seem to have changed your mind.”

“Yes. I… I like what you have. I would like to have it with my loved ones too. Be a vampire family and all that. Although I would need your help to turn them.”

“We could do that. Although don’t think we have been like this for so long. When spring comes it will be a year since Caspar came. He was the first.”

“But weren’t Lindhart, Bernie and all here before?”

“Well, yes. But I guess I was thinking how alive everything feels since he came. Plus, it was him and then, very soon, Petra too. Ferdinand came in the middle of the summer and Felix, in autumn.”

“And I came in winter.”

“Yes. Although it surprises me. In winter I’m the most miserable. All my scars hurt more. I don’t like the cold.”

“I figured it out. You always dress like it was way cold than it actually is.”

“You too”, noted Edelgard.

“Yes, but have you seen Caspar? He looks as if we were still in the middle of summer.”

“He trains all day and night. The only time he’s still enough time to cool down must be when he sleeps. And Lindhart keeps a giant mattress in his room, so I don’t think it’s a problem. But, as I was saying, we are fairly new to this experience of family. Maybe because most of us who were here alone until a year ago are more loners. But I don’t know. Maybe we could make it work. There is plenty of space to ignore each other if we need to.”

“That’s not exactly what I would call a good start”, retorted Lysithea, but Edelgard saw she was smiling.

That same night, she wrote several letters to her parents and friends to explain them what the plan was. The next morning she send them, while Hubert, Ferdinand, Lindhart, Edelgard and Petra busied themselves making a map of the palace and sorting what they could do in each place. Dorothea also joined them soon (“It’s bad idea to house kids in a tower so high, if there is a fire, they should be somewhere we can evacuate quickly. Plus that tower is really cold, you should see a better place. And who’s going to take care of those kids?”). Bernadetta snoop by too.

They went to bed late that night, too energized with new ideas to think about it before. And the same the next day. And the next. When a nightmare surprised her at last, she woke in anguish, like she always did, but that time she decided to go water the flowers she kept with Bernadetta, who found her talking to the plants about her little plans. The next day, she decided to go down to the kitchen to see if she would find Lysithea cooking there. Sparring with Caspar and Felix was also an option. Or discussing plans with Ferdinand. Or just being around Dorothea.

Little by little, the castle was reformed and Edelgard felt her heart too. She still had nightmares. She still new she never would be able to save her old friends. But she had new ones, some of them with gruesome stories like her own, others with a lighter and less painful past. She treasured them all.

Loving was a dangerous business. Sometimes, you could let in your heart someone who would only hurt you, but, other people would take your barren garden and fill it with flowers.

In the end, pain didn’t make people human. Love did. And Edelgard was ready to love her new friends as much as she could before destiny, fate or evil people took them from her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaand, almost nine months later, it is finished. Sorry all of you, I wish I could have done it sooner, but I became stuck on the last part. Plus, I wanted all chapters to have the same lenght, but this one got a little bit out of hand, so it was longer to finish too. But I'm pretty much satisfied with the result, so I won't complain. I hope you like it too, this was the first fic I got more than 10 kudos in this site and still blows my mind how many people liked that first chapter which I wrote in a whim and posted because I was bored. Thank you so much 💖💖


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